it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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