When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
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WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
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Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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