Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
