i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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