you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
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Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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