i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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