The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
