I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
they're like a gay fantastic four
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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