you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize