sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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