If i come over, it means nothing
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
