Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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