Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
