i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
