He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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