She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Randomize