Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drink are we having for lunch?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize