my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
50% drunk capacity currently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize