I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
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