is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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