Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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