Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
you inspire me to be a worse person
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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