He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
