You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
