'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize