i permit you to call me
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
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