Come see our sink grown plant.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize