hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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