Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize