your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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