he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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