Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
