That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
