in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
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You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
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All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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