She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
