Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
