So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
never play flip cup with pint glasses
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
i've created a new STD.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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