Slut skills are useful in every country.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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