I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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