She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
