Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
i came on her dog
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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