Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
