Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
