seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
