Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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