He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
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