I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
