I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
