the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize