I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
No subtext here. People are naked.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
