u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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